Someone Take The Wheel
3.18.2004
  Oh. MY. God.

I realize this is supposed to be comedy...and it's quite funny. It'd be funnier if it were the Dems doing the same routine as a satire, because judging by the applause timing, these clowns really believe this crap.

Transcript from the Keith Olbermann show of Bush's campaign kickoff at the meeting of Republican governors, Feb. 23:

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

GOV. MIKE HUCKABEE ®, ARKANSAS: We are so very glad that all of you could join us here tonight as we get under way to hear the president...

(PHONE RINGING)

HUCKABEE: Oh, my gosh. Excuse me.

(LAUGHTER)

HUCKABEE: Hello? I‘m sorry. I‘m right in the middle of an event.

It‘s who? It‘s God?

(LAUGHTER)

HUCKABEE: On the phone for me? How did he get my number? Oh, God has everybody‘s number. OK? Yes, I‘ll hold.

(LAUGHTER)

HUCKABEE: Yes, God? Yes, sir, I‘m right in the middle of—the president‘s coming. Yes, sir, he sure is. Oh, yes, sir, he‘s here, too. He is.

(LAUGHTER)

HUCKABEE: You see, you say you want—you need an autograph. Oh, for Sampson. I understand, yes, lord.

(LAUGHTER)

HUCKABEE: And, you know, God, this is a pretty big event. We‘ve got a lot of people and I‘ve only got a very short time here. Oh, you‘ve got all the time in the world. I understand. Yes, lord. And you want me to deliver a message. And that would be?

Yes, sir. Well, we want—yes, sir. We want to do what‘s right. And our president does. And we‘re behind him, yes, sir, we sure are. Yes, sir, we know you don‘t take sides in the election.

(LAUGHTER)

HUCKABEE: But, if you did, we kind of think you‘d hang in there with us, lord, we really do. So...

(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)

HUCKABEE: Yes, sir. We‘ll pass those good words on. I see. You talked to the president and he talks to you anyway. And we know that. And we know that—yes, sir. Take care of the family and marriage and the people of America and all the people and the children.

And, yes, sir, I can tell you, every one of us are committed to doing that and a whole army of people out here, and we pledge we‘ll do our very best to do that, sir. Yes, sir. Well, thank you for blessing me, and we‘ll bless you, too. Thank you. And thank you.

(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)

(END VIDEO CLIP)

OLBERMANN: Evidently, the lord does not like conference calls, nor speaker phones.
 
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  Burnt Toast

Atrios tells us that Poland's giving Bush the finger. A minister in Italy has said that the Iraq war may have been a mistake. Most Dutch and Italian citizens want their troops out. Meanwhile, Bush is left looking like the fool he is by having to ask our "allies" not to leave his little party before the lampshade's off his head.

 
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  Do You Think I'm like, Wacky and Stuff?

No Courtney, you're just a tired old skank-ho. Newsflash: No one wants to see your tits. Breast job or no breast job.


NEW YORK - Rocker Courtney Love (news) was arrested early Thursday after allegedly throwing a microphone stand at an East Village nightspot, striking a man in the head, police said.

-snip-
On Wednesday, Love, who is facing felony drug charges in California, repeatedly lifted her shirt during an appearance on the "Late Show with David Letterman."

-snip-
At the end of the interview, Love asked Letterman, "Do you think I'm like, wacky and stuff?"  
|
  Hey Genn, Get a Goddambed Job, Will Ya?

LAS VEGAS, Nevada (AP) -- A federal judge has dismissed a lawsuit accusing two former advisers to Bill Clinton of defaming Gennifer Flowers when they suggested that the audiotapes she used to try to prove she and Clinton had an affair had been doctored.

U.S. District Judge Philip M. Pro ruled that no reasonable jury could find "clear and convincing evidence" that James Carville and George Stephanopoulos acted with malice. 
|
  Ugh.

"A gay employee who is fired or demoted for attending a gay pride rally would receive protection from the Office of Special Counsel. But the same employee would have no recourse at OSC if he was fired or demoted simply for being gay.

This is new Special Counsel Scott Bloch’s initial reading of a 1978 law intended to protect employees and job applicants from adverse personnel actions taken against them for reasons unrelated to their job performance."

I really hope the Repugs rue the day they declared this culture jihad. The responses this time to their little culture war are so disgusting that most "moderate" people who don't even have a horse in the race are going to be so turned off by their lack of decency they're going to laugh them out of town.  
|
  Getting Desperate?

Samela tells us the local scoop on the Repugs attempts to derail the Democratic Convention. If they think causing some traffic jams in Boston is bad, just wait until everyone sees what holding the GOP convention on ground zero is going to do to New York.

The big local story here in Boston the last few days has been the attempt, begun by Governor Mutt Romney, to throw monkey wrenches into the plans for the Democratic Convention and create controversy around it. The Globe is giving the false controversy legs. It's a perfect example of media spin and mendacity.

Here's how it works.

Romney comes out the other day, in big front page article in the Boston Globe, and says the Dems should move their convention from the centrally located downtown Fleet Center, where it has been scheduled since last year, to the AS YET UNBUILT new Boston Convention Center in how-the-hell-do-you-get-there South Boston. The Fleet Center location will disrupt locals trying to get to work for a few days, says Gubnor Mutt. This is followed by articles in ensuing days quoting nobody 30-something Southie toughs, who are self-admittedly not Democrats, saying, yeah--the Democrats should give up their martinis at the fancy restaurants of Boston for some of the down and dirty pubs and coffee shops of South Boston. (Anyone seen Mystic River? You've got the idea.) Editorials are popping up about it, and letters to the editor.

Let's not discuss the fact that the new convention center is not yet even built and is scheduled to be completed only in June, one month before the convention. Let's not mention that a public building project in this area has never yet managed to be completed on time, even by a long shot (our local library remodel is now more than two years behind schedule in reopening). Let's not mention that the television crews would have no experience with filming in that location, whereas the Fleet Center, home to the Boston Celtics, is well known to all networks and has excellent press facilities, not to mention proximity to all the major hotels and businesses. Let's not mention that there are no hotels, restaurants, or other amenities in South Boston, nor will there be before the year 2020 probably. Let's not mention that it is a pain in the ass to get there (imo).

It's time for New York Democrats to start demanding that the Republican Convention move from Madison Square Garden because it will upset traffic at Penn Station and in the subways for 3 days. And it will create a security threat in Manhattan. That it should move to Queens. That those Republicans just want to sip their martinis at the Carlyle and stay in chic boutique hotels in lower Manhattan. Give some business to Bayside.

I'm disgusted. Another non-issue that the media is trumping up at the behest of the Republican machine ... while the real issues of the nation and world go unremarked. 
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3.17.2004
  The Passion Of The Whacko

Thought we might just need a reminder:

Bush said to James Robinson: 'I feel like God wants me to run for President. I can't explain it, but I sense my country is going to need me. Something is going to happen... I know it won't be easy on me or my family, but God wants me to do it.'

Lots of other scary stuff in this article, so you have to read it all for yourself. But I thought in these days of troubled times and racial, sexual and religious division, that we might all just need a booster, a reminder of sorts about just how truly fucked up our current president is. Oh, and by the way, the Rhea County Commission just voted unanimously to ban gays from living in Rhea County. Now THAT's Leadership. Congratulations, chimp-boy. Mission Accomplished.

 
|
  GAG

How much more could we possibly capitalize on the commodity that has become what the guy who used to stand for throwing over the money tables in the temple used to stand for?

hmm?

 
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3.16.2004
  Holy Shiite!

WASHINGTON -- The woman charged with working for the Iraqi spy agency is a distant cousin of President Bush's chief of staff, Andrew Card, and has held a variety of jobs in journalism and on Capitol Hill.

Susan Lindauer, 41, worked in the press offices of four Democratic members of Congress. She also worked for Fortune magazine, U.S. News & World Report, the Seattle Post-Intelligencer and Fox News.

Her father, John Lindauer, was the Republican nominee for governor in Alaska in 1998. His campaign unraveled because of charges of campaign finance violations to which he pleaded no contest.  
|
  I'm Karen Ryan Reporting (NOT)

Here's a transcript of one of the fake news releases the press ran for Bushco. Notice you have to read it in Google's cached page of the KSWO transcript. Because if you go to the page now, it appears to have been scrubbed.

http://www.google.com/search?q=cache:-61n_RhOhkQJ:www.kswo.com/transcript.htm+%22karen+ryan%22+medicare&hl=en&ie=UTF-8 
|
  Harold's Still Giving Them Hell

Boy. This guy better not travel in small aircraft or visit Sugarland Texas anytime soon. He comes out with another zinger:

The fact is, George Bush's record on OUR homeland security issues is so poor that Time Magazine this morning is reporting that he has ordered his Homeland Security Department staff to take time away from their duties to find opportunities to "pose" George Bush in "photo-ops" on homeland security issues. We need a president who is gives us action, not photo-ops.” -- International Association of Fire Fighters, AFL-CIO, General President Harold Schaitberger

 
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  New Bush Poster Tool

www.infiniteanger.com has made a handy dandy poster tool to replace the toy the Bushies took away.



hint: hit refresh throughout the day and you can see what slogans others have come up with. 
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  Halliburton Subcontractor Threatens to Murder Kittens Live On The Air

Ok, not quite. But almost as bad:

Halliburton Subcontractor Threatens to Withhold Food from Troops

The letter also criticizes KBR for late payments to food subcontractors, said Army officials, who gave details of the letter but declined to provide a copy. At least one subcontractor has threatened to withhold food service to about 2,000 U.S. soldiers in Iraq, leading the Pentagon's inspector general to investigate KBR food-subcontractor complaints that KBR isn't paying its bills on time. 
|
  I Repeat, A C**t

Profanity carved into Blair's Commons table

A vandal managed to carve 'Tony Blair is a c***' into the Commons table used by the Prime Minister.

-snip-
"Furniture polishers were brought in straight away and the message was removed shortly before the Prime Minister's question session started."
 
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3.15.2004
  Toast

Hey loser, newsflash: even the right-wing wackos think you're toast. Buh bye. Drudge tells us:

PASSION OF THE CHRIST director Mel Gibson says he now has 'doubts' about President Bush and re-election... MORE... In the interview, set to air on Tuesday , Gibson says of Bush: 'I am having doubts, of late. It mainly has to do with the weapons [of mass destruction] claims'... MORE... The surprisingly critical comments from Gibson, a rare conservative voice in Hollywood, come as PASSION continues to dominate the boxoffice.

 
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3.14.2004
  More Lies and Lying Liars

Federal investigators are scrutinizing television segments in which the Bush administration paid people to pose as journalists praising the benefits of the new Medicare law, which would be offered to help elderly Americans with the costs of their prescription medicines.

The videos are intended for use in local television news programs. Several include pictures of President Bush receiving a standing ovation from a crowd cheering as he signed the Medicare law on Dec. 8.

The materials were produced by the Department of Health and Human Services, which called them video news releases, but the source is not identified. Two videos end with the voice of a woman who says, "In Washington, I'm Karen Ryan reporting."

But the production company, Home Front Communications, said it had hired her to read a script prepared by the government. 
|
  My Boyfriend's Back And He's Going To Kick Your Ass

Hey La Hey La...

BushKnew brings us this report from Clark's recent appearance:

As the need for multilateralism became clear, the moderator asked:
"Is there any hope that in the future this will change?"
"Not while this administration is in office" Clark said to thunderous applause.
"My journalism instinct requires me to intervene here" Priest said. "There are some signs of optimism in the present administration - Rumsfiled is talking to NATO - we can say that they are on a learning curve. Even Clinton..."
"People died for their learming curve!!!!" I screamed all the way from the W row.
"Was Halliburton part of that curve too?" another one yelled from the back.
"Booooo!"
"That didn't go over well" she said coyly
"That learning curve is accelerating with the approacing of the November elections" Clark said - to thunderous applause
While I was campaigning I spoke of an exit strategy from Iraq - the fact that they have none. The White House called it "apalling" then the next day they called Paul Bremer for talks and started talking about a "strategy for success"
More applause
"I don't want to sound self-serving - this is a functiuon of the political process. let's just say, I am glad there are elections every 4 years" 
|
  You're Gonna Looose!!

WASHINGTON (AFP) - President George W. Bush's mom is worried her son's re-election campaign could end with a crushing defeat like the one her husband experienced in 1992.

-snip-

Bush's wife, Laura, and his mother are increasingly questioning the agility and management of the current president's campaign, Time said quoting two "well-placed sources."

 
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  Those Were The Days

If you were having fun with the handy Bush Poster tool, your fun has come to an end. They've now changed the site so you can only select from a dropdown box. I, personally, took great glee, knowing that the Bush Campaign was storing the info that was entered in a database and someone was reviewing the results, as I made this one:



Common Dreams tells us some others included: "Run for your lives," "They sure smell like old people," and the Orwellian, "A boot stomping on a human face forever."... "'Five hundred dead soldiers support Bush-Cheney '04.'
 
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  Business As Usual

"The government's longtime chief analyst of Medicare costs said yesterday
that Bush administration officials threatened to fire him last year if he
disclosed to Congress that he believed the prescription drug legislation
favored by the White House would prove far more expensive than lawmakers
had been told." 
|
  Oh My

CLEVELAND, Ohio (AP) -- A maintenance worker was suspended for displaying a sign with the word "traitor" on his state snowplow while helping provide security for President Bush's motorcade, officials said.

Michael Gerstenslager was asked to park a snowplow on an entrance ramp to block access to a highway the president's motorcade used to travel from Cleveland Hopkins International Airport into downtown Cleveland on Wednesday.



 
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Rip out the table
we need room to move
in a life unstable
you're so easily amused
anywhere you hang
yourself is home
throw in a tape, fix the tone

The windows are dirty let's hope it rains
add another newspaper
something to do with my change
I see we're fighting again
In some fucking land
throw in another tape man

Someone take the wheel
and I don't know where we're going
anybody say what you feel
everybody's sad, but nobody's showing

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