Someone Take The Wheel
  The Gay Agenda

Just in case you haven't seen it yet:

6:00 am Gym
8:00 am Breakfast (oatmeal and egg whites)
9:00 am Hair appointment
10:00 am Shopping
12:00 PM Brunch

2:00 PM
1) Assume complete control of the U.S. Federal, State and Local
Governments as well as all other national governments,
2) Recruit all straight youngsters to our debauched lifestyle,
3) Destroy all healthy heterosexual marriages,
4) Replace all school counselors in grades K-12 with agents of Colombian
and Jamaican drug cartels,
5) Establish planetary chain of "homo breeding gulags" where over-medicated
imprisoned straight women are turned into artificially impregnated baby
factories to produce prepubescent love slaves for our devotedly
pederastic gay leadership,
6) bulldoze all houses of worship, and
7) Secure total control of the INTERNET and all mass media for the
exclusive use of child pornographers.

2:30 PM Get forty winks of beauty rest to prevent facial wrinkles from
stress of world conquest
4:00 PM Cocktails
6:00 PM Light Dinner (soup, salad, with Chardonnay)
8:00 PM Theater
11:00 PM Bed (du jour)?

Thanks to Deucednuisance! 
  Common Consciousness

BOSTON, Massachusetts (AP) -- A man developed temporary amnesia from the shock of dreaming that his son was killed in combat in Iraq, even though the young man was fine and not even in the military, according to a report in a medical journal. 
  What Is Opus Dei?

Find out more about what Mel Gibson and his nutcase dad believe here
  More On Mel

Gibson's movie, which is apparently only being shown to sympathetic audiences (primarily fundamentalist Protestants, including Pat Robertson, who got a special screening) is being criticized for depicting Jews as bloodthirsty and vengeful, bent on killing Jesus:

"When we read the screenplay our sense was this wasn't really something you could fix. All the way through, the Jews are portrayed as bloodthirsty. We're really concerned that this could be one of the great crises in Christian-Jewish relations," said Sr. Mary C. Boys, a professor at New York Union Theological Seminary.
  HA HA!

Daytona has to set up a special hotline for all the complaints about the Bush Visit. I just love it when their ridiculous campaign stunts backfire. Mission Accomplished! 
  Bush Slogan of the Day

See more at: 
  Bush Abortion Story Disappears (poof!)

The Daily Telegraph reported on the Bush Abortion story (to be released by Larry Flynt) yesterday and the link today is dead. Guess the poodle made that phone call and with the pending/potential breaking of the BBC looming and all...

There is still some coverage of the story here
  Gonna Wash That Man Right Outta My Hair

AUSTIN – A political committee connected to U.S. House Majority Leader Tom DeLay sent $190,000 in what internal memos say were corporate donations to the Republican National Committee, which then doled out the same amount to seven candidates in Texas House races.

It is illegal in Texas to use corporate money in political races, and some open-government advocates suggest the transaction smells of a money-laundering exercise.
  Read It While You Can

Will Pitt makes a good catch when he relates that the White House seems to have forgotten to update their website. They still claim:

* The U.N. and U.S. intelligence sources have known for some time that Saddam Hussein has materials to produce chemical and biological weapons, but he has not accounted for them:
* 26,000 liters of anthrax—enough to kill several million people
* 38,000 liters of botulinum toxin
* 500 tons of sarin, mustard and VX nerve agents
* Almost 30,000 munitions capable of delivering chemical agents

Thanks to Faun Otter! 
  More Good News

Mayor Daley said Wednesday he would have "no problem" with County Clerk David Orr issuing marriage licenses to gay couples -- and Orr said he's open to a San Francisco-style protest if a consensus can be built.

"They're your doctors, your lawyers, your journalists, your politicians," the mayor said. "They're someone's son or daughter. They're someone's mother or father. . . . I've seen people of the same sex adopt children, have families. great parents. 
  Today Is A Good Day

HOUSTON Feb. 18 — Jeffrey Skilling, the former Enron Corp. chief executive who resigned less than four months before the company imploded in scandal, was expected to surrender Thursday on charges related to the company's collapse, sources told The Associated Press on Wednesday.

The criminal charges come almost exactly two years after Skilling told Congress he knew nothing about serious problems at the energy trader.
  Crazy Freakin' Nutcase of the Day
Mel Gibson's dad says the holocaust was exaggerated (just in case you need remindin' that was 6 MILLION):

"It's all - maybe not all fiction - but most of it is," he said, adding that the gas chambers and crematoria at camps like Auschwitz would not have been capable of exterminating so many people..."

Make sure your right-wing religio-crazy friends know that before they go pouring into all those movie theatres. 
  Gay Penguin for President!

Bloggerheads tipped me off to this hilarious website
  Stranger Beats Him With the AWOL Stick

For 60 solid minutes... 
  Resident Evil

By Whizard of Whimsy 
  Texas Is Hell

BROWNSVILLE-- A 31-year-old high school history teacher was sentenced Tuesday to 27 months in federal prison for selling guns out of his drive-through beer store.

Sotero Sotello, 31, of Brownsville, also must pay a $3,000 fine.
Sotello pleaded guilty in November to dealing in firearms without a license after investigators caught him selling guns to an informant posing as an illegal immigrant from Mexico.

  Miserable Failure

They tried makeshift ways of strengthening the vehicles' flimsy undersides. "We filled the floorboards with sandbags as much as we could, except for the gas pedal and the brake," he said. "You know, you have to operate the vehicles."

The efforts didn't stop the grenade that ripped through the opening between the gas pedal and the brake — and ripped away most of Hurt's right leg. "It just kind of bounced on the road, and I just drove over it and it exploded," he recalled.

His father, Larry Hurt, a veteran himself, was surprised when he visited Derrick at a military hospital to find so many other soldiers who also were wounded in their unarmored vehicles. "Burn victims, loss of hands, lots of other injuries, too," he remembered. "It really brings it home to you walking down the halls."


Local citizens, hearing of their plight, donated money, and a local steel company offered to turn 12,000 pounds of raw steel into armor custom-fit to their trucks — free of charge.

  You Can Say That Again

WASHINGTON - The White House backed away Wednesday from its own prediction that the economy will add 2.6 million new jobs before the end of this year, saying the forecast was the work of number-crunchers and that President Bush was not a statistician.  

This picture's just plain creepy. However, it is appropriate that there are storm clouds gathering over his head.

Translation: "Fuhrer, we will follow you" 

AP says Dean has announced the end of his campaign. Sorry, Deanies. I know how you're feeling today. Howard, thanks for helping us find our spine.

  Ya Think?

LONDON,(Reuters) - An advertisement for a talking dartboard featuring a cartoon of a topless woman with targets over her breasts was condemned by Britain's advertising watchdog on Wednesday for condoning violence against women.

The ad, which appeared in the Burton menswear Christmas catalog, included text inviting players to "Hit the target and I squeal with delight!" and "Didn't feel a thing, big boy ... that hit the spot!"

An elderly German motorist didn't realise he'd left his wife at a service station until he completed his journey an hour later.

The 75-year-old carried on driving down the motorway in Rhineland-Pfalz after he had stopped for a quick break at one of the country's motorway rest areas.


A police spokesman said: "Her husband rang later in the evening to ask if anybody had found his wife."
  Super Patriot American Freak

Speaks for itself...

Thanks to Killer Tomato 

Best Blog

For the second year in a row, the Koufax Award for Best Blog goes to Atrios of Eschaton.

It should be noted that four other finalists received vote totals that would have won in 2002. Nonetheless, Atrios still has the Best Blog. The reasons are many. First is Atrios’s productivity. No one posts more often or on so wide a range of topics. As Observer noted in comments, “In the time it took me to type this, he updated again.”

It is not just Atrios’ productivity that makes him the best. Another commenter noted “I feel most at home at Atrios' whilst a big backyard party goes on. I smile, I laugh at the comment threads, I go check out the topics and insights of others I heard about at Atrios.”

Digby once said that Atrios “consistently (has)… his finger on the pulse. He’s the Beatles of Blogging. It's spooky the way he sees the trend before anybody else.”

That is exactly right. Congratulations to Atrios, the Beatles of blogging.

Monkeyfister works at one of the Navy recruiting offices and writes the following. All the previous scares about reinstituting the draft had been waved away by his insider information. Now this:

"The mullets at Daytona failed to line up for military service this weekend. There is a palpable heaviness here at Navy Recruiting Command, and nobody who was there seems to want to comment on the horrible return on the NASCAR investment.

Army and Marines gave away tons of goodies, but NO ONE was willing to talk or sign a contract. They say the results were "dreary". The code word here has shifted from "active recruiting" to "awareness," and that has my hackles up.

The "National Call To Service" has just been fully implemented (just last week), but so far there are very few takers. The Army Nat'l Guard is giving away TONS of free money and college tuition waivers for anyone who will sign on, but the desperation seems palpable with that crowd.

CODE BLUE-- What's that mean?

Well, it all depends on Nov. 2nd... If Shrubby gets elected-- count on the draft gates beginning to open by Spring 2006 to Fall of same year. I just got word, that my biggest arguement AGAINST the Draft-- lack of buildings at RTC's-- is getting chipped at. New buildings ARE being built at Great Lakes RTC, Camp LeJuene, and Ft Leonard Wood. Bad signs.

There is still plenty of time, but one might consider saving up some plane fare, and getting Passports in line for the possibility of the BFEE looking for fresh meat. Even the upper-level guys here, who poo-poo'd the idea of a draft a couple of months ago, are beginning to discuss the possibilities.

NOTHING IS IMMINENT-- This is just a heads-up, but I'll keep the Draft Warning at CODE BLUE until further notice."

More on this discussion here

  Good Riddance to Bad Rubbish

How come all the bad guys come from Texas?

Judge Caught On Tape Making Racial Slur Steps Down
A Brazoria County justice of the peace stepped down Monday after a state hearing.

The Judicial Conduct Commission decided Matt Zepeda should be removed from the bench permanently after he was caught on tape in a jail making a racial slur and cursing at inmates.

clip from previous story:

"You don't have any f-----g rights," he told Ronald Hickman, who was being held in jail on a charge of attempted burglary of a coin-operated machine.

"Are you going to act like a f-----g n----r?" Zepeda asked Luttrell, who is white.

Zepeda was suspended without pay last December (2002) by the Texas Supreme Court 
  You Want Scandal? I Got Your Scandal.

Now the incorrigible Larry Flynt says he plans to market a Bush abortion story as genuine - in a book to be published this summer by Kensington Press.

"This story has got to come out," the wheelchair-bound Hustler magazine honcho told the Daily News' Corky Siemaszko. "There's a lot of hypocrisy in the White House about this whole abortion issue."

Flynt claimed that Bush arranged for the procedure in the early '70s.

"I've talked to the woman's friends," Flynt said. "I've tracked down the doctor who did the abortion, I tracked down the Bush people who arranged for the abortion," Flynt said. "I got the story nailed."

Flynt wouldn't disclose whether he plans to name the woman.

  Real Work? What's That?

Everything these guys do is scripted:

Bush spoke at a window factory, the latest such plant he has chosen to showcase what he says are the favorable impacts of his tax policies on small business. His makeshift stage was near the production floor, and he was flanked by small business owners and an employee

Bush's tour of the factory floor was also highly stage-managed by the White House.

As he entered, a half-dozen workers were steadily polishing windows, as if Bush had walked into an ordinary shift on President's Day. News cameras snapped away as Bush picked up a caulking gun and hugged workers.

Five minutes after Bush and his entourage of journalists left, the factory floor was deserted, and there was no sign later in the day that production had resumed.

  A Little Late, But Still a Great Gift Idea

  Kitten Shows Up Resident

  Today's Most Amusing Headline

Bush Calls for End to Arms Trafficking 
  Corrupt Resident Pardons Corrupt Mayor

  I Hear That Whistle Blowin'

WASHINGTON (AP) - A federal prosecutor in a major terrorism case in Detroit has taken the rare step of suing Attorney General John Ashcroft, alleging the Justice Department interfered with the case, compromised a confidential informant and exaggerated results in the war on terrorism.

Assistant U.S. Attorney Richard Convertino of Detroit accused the Justice Department of "gross mismanagement" of the war on terrorism in a whistleblower lawsuit filed late Friday in federal court in Washington.



Bush meets with National Guard members in order to "move beyond" the issue of his being AWOL. As if. 
  Drudge Schmudge

We all knew it was a lie. Guess those crazy repugs just couldn't keep their minds off the Democratic zipper for too long. They were obviously suffering from withdrawals:

A woman who has been the subject of rumours linking her to Senator John Kerry has denied that she ever had an affair with the Democratic presidential candidate.

Breaking her silence four days after the allegations surfaced on the Internet, Alexandra Polier issued a statement to The Associated Press, saying, "I have never had a relationship with Senator Kerry, and the rumours in the press are completely false."

Kerry already has denied reports that he had an extramarital affair.

  Upset About Gay Marriages in S.F.?

You should comfort yourself. At least they're marrying within their species!

Boy marries puppy

A tribal priest in eastern India has married a five year old boy to a dog to keep evil spirits away from him and his family.

Bonjh Gope conducted the marriage of Samir Mudiya to a puppy on the concluding day of a three day tribal festival at Kuluptanaga in Jharkhand state.

The Press Trust of India reports that guests who came to see the "newly wed couple" danced to drum beats and were served home brewed beer and local delicacies.

The groom's father Shanbabu claimed that four such marriages had taken place this year.

  Hmmm...I Think I Knew This Kid

Or someone like him:

Parents fined for boy's testicle kick

The parents of a nine-year-old Atlanta boy have been fined £8,000 after he kicked a waiter in the testicles.

It happened in April 1999 when the waiter was helping to set up a wedding reception at the boy's home.

The waiter, then aged 26, claimed the parents left their two boys unsupervised while they went to the wedding.

The unnamed victim claimed the nine-year-old and his younger brother ran around "wildly".

He also claimed the oldest child threatened him and other catering staff with a knife. He said he stepped in and asked the boy to put the knife down and go out to the back of the house.

  We're Baaaaack.

I've got high speed cable and no more excuses. My boyfriend may have dropped out of the race, but I'm still hopeful about a VP ticket. Bush is getting beat by the AWOL stick (for now) and the spare tires are on. Turn it up so I don't have to think.

p.s. There's a guy in Texas who's saying Bush's base in Alabama didn't HAVE A DENTIST. Suck on that Rove.


Rip out the table
we need room to move
in a life unstable
you're so easily amused
anywhere you hang
yourself is home
throw in a tape, fix the tone

The windows are dirty let's hope it rains
add another newspaper
something to do with my change
I see we're fighting again
In some fucking land
throw in another tape man

Someone take the wheel
and I don't know where we're going
anybody say what you feel
everybody's sad, but nobody's showing

10/05/2003 - 10/12/2003 10/12/2003 - 10/19/2003 10/19/2003 - 10/26/2003 10/26/2003 - 11/02/2003 11/02/2003 - 11/09/2003 11/09/2003 - 11/16/2003 11/16/2003 - 11/23/2003 11/23/2003 - 11/30/2003 11/30/2003 - 12/07/2003 12/07/2003 - 12/14/2003 12/14/2003 - 12/21/2003 02/15/2004 - 02/22/2004 02/22/2004 - 02/29/2004 02/29/2004 - 03/07/2004 03/07/2004 - 03/14/2004 03/14/2004 - 03/21/2004 03/21/2004 - 03/28/2004 03/28/2004 - 04/04/2004 04/04/2004 - 04/11/2004 04/11/2004 - 04/18/2004 04/18/2004 - 04/25/2004 04/25/2004 - 05/02/2004 05/02/2004 - 05/09/2004 05/09/2004 - 05/16/2004 05/16/2004 - 05/23/2004 05/23/2004 - 05/30/2004 05/30/2004 - 06/06/2004 06/13/2004 - 06/20/2004 06/20/2004 - 06/27/2004 07/04/2004 - 07/11/2004 07/11/2004 - 07/18/2004 07/18/2004 - 07/25/2004 07/25/2004 - 08/01/2004 08/01/2004 - 08/08/2004 08/22/2004 - 08/29/2004 08/29/2004 - 09/05/2004 09/05/2004 - 09/12/2004 09/12/2004 - 09/19/2004 09/19/2004 - 09/26/2004 09/26/2004 - 10/03/2004 10/10/2004 - 10/17/2004 01/16/2005 - 01/23/2005 01/23/2005 - 01/30/2005 01/30/2005 - 02/06/2005 02/06/2005 - 02/13/2005 02/13/2005 - 02/20/2005 02/20/2005 - 02/27/2005

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